Secret Cabinet Meeting in Co. Offaly

It has emerged that the Irish Cabinet had a secret meeting last night in a secluded place near Clara, the Taoiseach's home village in Co. Offaly.
When asked about it by journalists, the government's new unofficial spokesman Willie O'Dea refused to comment. But a reliable eyewitness reports that the meeting was held "in the spirit of the season", even though "some would have mistaken it for a gathering of the Ku Klux Klan".
Only Tanaiste Mary Coughlan (pictured right) refused to wear the traditional over-garment and appeared uncovered.
"I wouldn't wear a burka, so I'm not wearing this either," she was overheard saying to Taoiseach Brian Cowen, who eventually accepted her "eccentric attitude".
Foreign Affairs Minister Michael Martin commented that it was "not a beauty contest", adding that otherwise he would take his bedsheet off, too. But the Taoiseach was having none of it.
"You can do that in Cork, you tosser," he told Martin, "but not here in Clara. This is Offaly!"
Despite attempts to learn more about the nature of the meeting, no statement was issued and all participants have refused to comment.

Brian Cowen's Hallowe'en Address

While many Heads of State give a traditional address to their nation on Christmas Day, and many Prime Ministers speak to their people on New Year's Day (January 1st), Ireland's new Prime Minister, who is a fluent speaker of Irish (Us Gaelge), decided to create a tradition of his own.
Taoiseach Brian Cowen addressed the Irish nation today, on Samhain, the day that is traditionally the Celtic New Year's Day.

The address was broadcast live from Cowen's home in Clara, Co. Offaly, by RTÉ Radio 1 and Television. However, many people watching with a sense of anticipation were rather disappointed and said that they were not able to understand what the Taoiseach was saying. Well, that's not a new thing with Brian Cowen. It happens every week in the Dail, too.

President in waiting?

Remember Bertie Ahern?

It's been very quiet lately around the backbench TD from Drumcondra, Bass drinker, chancer, constant witness (at the Mahon Tribunal), happy father of a novelist and relaxed grandfather, since he resigned as Taoiseach and handed the office, as well as the leadership of Fianna Fail, over to Brian Cowen.

He is seen in Leinster House now and then - but not very often - and only attends sessions of the Dail occassionally. What else he is doing is a bit of a mystery.

Some say that he is writing his memoires. Well, given all the things he cannot remember in front of the tribunal, this might turn out to be a very small and short book...

But insiders have another piece of information, and that sounds really interesting and very, very alarming. Apparently Bertie is deliberately keeping a low profile to make us forget what he did during his years as Taoiseach, and - more important - what he failed to do while at the helm, such as preparing the state for a recession (that many analysts predicted correctly for years).

He is - they say - quietly preparing a come-back. Not at Leinster House though. There he has truly and thoroughly burned his ships for good. No, Bertie is aiming higher.
Since the chance to become the first permanent President of the EU was shattered by the Irish NO to the Lisbon Treaty, Bertie Ahern has now set his eyes on Phoenix Park. There is a lot of evidence that he wants to become the next President of Ireland, when President Mary McAleese (left) comes to the end of her second seven-year term in 2011 and cannot stand again.

Well, Bertie is obviously hoping that the Irish people have a very short memory, or even suffer from the same kind of partial amnesia he has claimed for himself so many times at the Mahon Tribunal. If his ploy works, we will become a real laughing stock around the world and could as well elect Micky Mouse as our next President. I think that the Irish nation deserves a lot better.

A Message from the Taoiseach

"Every economic crisis can be overcome
by using the right political instruments."